Mya Hi Mya, thank you for your question. As a father of two, I can understand how this would be difficult. In order to answer your question comprehensively, I’ll assume the offender has been arrested, charged, convicted, completed his sentence and has been released when you meet him.
All types of criminals, regardless of what type of crime they commit, are sick and misguided. By this I mean they are sick in their thought process due to greed, lust, jealousy, and many other things. Because of this sickness, their thinking and actions are abnormal and illogical which leads to their criminal activity.
The curing of the sickness and the atoning takes place when the criminal can recognize his mistakes and accept his guilt and begin to change his way thinking. This atonement can only be carried out if the criminal is removed from society and is then taught the correct, healthy and lawful ways of thinking and acting. In most cases the criminal needs help to accomplish this from his fellow human beings. This help could come from psychologists, psychiatrists, family members, the prison system and many other places. Basically, a criminal is a human being that needs help.
If you were to encounter a criminal, the first and most important step is to understand him and his way of thinking. I covered this in the video as point #3: Learn to understand other people, where they come from, how and why they think like they do and develop an inner acceptance. The first thing you could assess about the former criminal is, does he feel remorse? Has he learned his lesson and is he ready to join society and become a lawful citizen? This is an important thing to know. It’s not right to be hostile towards someone who has completed their sentence and is trying to become a contributing member of society. In this case, try and think about leniency and fairness. What about forgiveness? Could there be room for forgiveness in your thinking?
It’s really important to understand the difference between an individual human being and their behavior. It’s not right to hate a person because of their behavior. It’s their bad behavior that needs to be assessed and corrected, not the person. This is the difference. All types of people in our society, both criminals and non-criminals, need help and support in order to learn and grow and this help and support begins with fellow human beings showing benevolence and fairness and forgiveness.
To the core of your question:
If you were told that John had sexually assaulted a child and then you were introduced to John, there is no possibility of neutrality in your thinking because you have already assigned him a “label” in your thinking. In other words, you have pre-judged him with whatever a sexual offender means to you. Since this has already happened, the next best thing would be to ask questions and learn how his thinking is working. Get to know his personality and his experiences and what drive and motivates him. The only way to decide if he is a future criminal or a returning member of society that wants to learn and grow is through your discernment, intellect and fairness during your interactions with him.
Does this answer your question or is there anything else that could be expanded upon?
Salome,
Mike